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so today is kind of a special day because I’m getting married today and Michael’s getting married or both getting married today together like Michael and I’ve been planning this for a while died actually it’s 2019 I wanted to get married on January 9 so that it could be 1919 but today is actually January 11th we decided not to do it because Michael thought it was like not the best of luck then we get married on the 9th so she’s instead we’re getting married on January 11th which was really like better luck for one-one-one but apparently there’s a luck calendar I mean do you guys have this like when you guys decided to get married or when you decide to get married are you going to have like look at a love kill endure like it’s not a big thing to me but it was to her I respected that probably 111 is easier term but I don’t know but 1919 is at least I can remember the year so I can remember like how many years been married [Music] but we’re getting married in 2019 yes okay like you’re gonna carry that nine every year that means softly your life or is there yeah what’s 11 so I guess we’re getting on anime done nothing day no supposed to get married on a bad day it’s Haiyan which is the best day plan the best day of the month is this Friday it’s Friday but basically we’re gonna submit our marriage registration form to the show which is the city government since I’m a foreigner I had to go to the US Embassy and fill out declaration of like Who I am my parents and whatnot we have that form and then we actually fill out the registration form is interesting because I actually had to get a signature phone of my friends and am I glad to get a signature from one of her friends as witnesses one of my friends yo actually fill it out I went to his clinic you can see him right here the video I’m ready to get married I’ve been waiting my entire life [Music] most I probably forgot to sign under the dr. handsome Michael is having it right now [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] all right so more waiting looks like submitted the papers and now we have to wait about an hour think about an hour yeah I think it’s a little bit more complicated because a lot of the documentation is in English because on my side and so they have to check out the translations and whatnot it was Japanese people I think it’d be a lot easier alright so I think a little bit more waiting I think I don’t know it’s like sure wherever you want let’s tell the race just even the time some people 50% 35 percent divorce rate in Japan and 50% of course rates [Music] [Music] [Music] for me all right guys the remarried is that all right so just got married actually you know what Michael can you like join this I’m good on that side so like while we were sitting and waiting for the guys like to confirm our marriage we started to discuss like like ceremonies here in Japan and like what we’re going to do about the ceremony and like we’re kind of we’re still up in the air one because we just don’t know what we want to do and two we’re trying to like figure out the cost cuz we don’t want to spend too much money on a wedding right and there’s like there’s several ways to do it how does that work like Japan if you have a wedding the parents pay maybe there’s a traditional way who pays not but like I think nowadays it doesn’t really matter usually whoever is getting married is the one who’s paying really I think so I think in the u.s. traditionally the woman’s parents pays the husband side pay for anything early for something else good quite sure but I think I think the reason being is like traditionally like you’re supposed to give away the bride and usually like the they want the husband to take care of their daughter so she’s like entering into his family I never like people from the US correct me if I’m wrong but I think nowadays that’s not so much the case it really depends on that are like financial situation but I think that was that’s how it was nowadays we’re like from what I heard from my friends they tried to pay with what they have but their parents support if they ask for something yeah I think it really depends on the case this may be like my friends are not really the traditional yeah I’m not quite sure but these are just really expensive in general and I think we’re both in the same mindset if we’re gonna spend that much money for a wedding we’d rather just like go on a vacation and like use that money to buy a house or I feel like even let’s say we’re just gonna do like a honeymoon I spent that wedding money to go to the honeymoon it’s still not gonna be a mount for wedding I gotta say like a wedding you let’s say like wedding would probably cost like some Yakima 3 million yen 3 million dollars and usually guests are supposed to pay like a lot of money so you usually just feel like buboes money new mom I feel like but I don’t know maybe that I’m wrong like what I hear for my friends so yes one thing about Japan and it’s something that’s real that was really new to me when I first came to Japan is if you attend a wedding I think of like a rough amount that you pay about 30000 yen which is like roughly three hundred thousand that’s minimum okay a friend okay which is roughly around three hundred dollars a little less than three hundred dollars to attend the wedding and that’s like right a lot of bit of money right yeah but like that’s actually like that usually takes up like up to half or like 2/3 of whatever you spend on the wedding if they have a lot of guests then that’s actually one way that they’re able to make their money back like it adds up once if you have a lot of guests and they’re all paying like between three hundred to four to five hundred dollars per head that’s quite a lot of money you can have like a pretty extravagant wedding with all those guests that’s why some Japanese people have like these big weddings but one thing for me is especially around like this age as you get older I have a lot of friends that are getting married around this time and I’ve got invited to quite a bit of weddings and I’m just like I don’t know if I want to spend that money to go to the thing is sometimes like you get invited to friends that you’re not even that close to right that happens you get like you know I’m like dude I met you five years ago you like hung out for a little bit now you’re inviting me wedding and so you get a like you get a lot of those invites as well because people want you to attend it hurts when you’re young like 300 bucks this is a lot for like a person who has no money yeah just saying like it looking I was in my 20s especially right yeah and you have friends when you have friends that are getting married you’re like oh my gosh that’s I can’t afford it to attend these weddings like my mom told me like when I leave him back to do years yeah she told me that it used to be like Verizon groom invites more relatives or like there are other people that work work or their boss or you know like the schoolteachers or who can pay a lot for your buddy so usually pays off more but like nowadays people invites more friends so it doesn’t matter you really good puffs yeah so yeah that’s actually one thing that’s changing yeah so I think the difference in the u.s. is I don’t think they have this like gift system in terms of by giving the $300 they just have a demonstration yeah they have registration to use like register yeah I had a place and then people just choose from combat as like like I learned this only from sex in the cities you know my old my information from Sex in the City but I remember Carey was showing it by the wedding gift yeah registered and she has to go to different departments that are like a scores and oh it’s already bought or like something like so she had to buy like something that’s left on that list so like they send you the list Tobiah like how is that you can just go online no I also they send you like invitation with list I think so that’s kind of what I me a gift so that’s the u.s. I think again help us out so yeah that’s kind of like we were married now I just wanted to let you guys know if you guys want to support the channel like always there’s always like links in the description a wasted like donate to our channel maybe we’ll use it for a wedding in the future or we may take the money and just go on a really nice vacation our honeymoon kind of thing but anyways all of that support is always much appreciated or if you guys just want to like send us a card or something you’re gonna like send us a card or send us some like treats from your country okay I’ll definitely open it up on my Instagram channel our mailing address I’ll also leave that in the description for you guys so PSN send us stuff definitely I’ll open it up on my Instagram account anyways that’s how Japan is like what is it like in your country let us know like how you guys handle cuz actually like we’d like to know think people are more on the western model like you know register out of place but I don’t know I don’t even know what like what it is in like Singapore or oh how I did in Korea yeah I’m not quite sure let us know in the comments like or Europe I’m not coming up quite sure also let us know what you think about the marriage customs here in Japan what you think about the $300.00 let us know you think if you agree with it if you don’t agree with it let us know what you guys do in your country because we kind of want to know if you like this video help me out and hit that like button if you want to see more of my ventures in Tokyo or Japan or any of my guides hit that subscribe button or the Bell button and all right guys [Music]

James Carver

100 Replies to “What Getting Married in Japan is Really like”

  1. congrats for getting married. Sorry, dude bad idea talking about divorce percentage at the wedding day. Been married to my Japanese wife for over 25 years.

  2. @8:00 its so interesting for you to explain the culture
    and engage it it conversation comparing it to other practice
    really cool!

  3. I cant believe japanese people make their guests pay to attend their wedding! Weddings are totally free in my country.. you send a gift but it doesn’t feel like you’re paying to attend!

  4. Yoy guys have literally the boring marriage system! Just Visit India you will know how we celebrate marriage😂🤣

  5. Your wife can speak English with US slang really damn good. A rare sight to see Japanese speak English. Congratulations btw guys ✌🏼

  6. Congrats guys! I am coming to visit Tokyo on October, hope to bump into you guys in Shibuya!

    PS: we have been binge watching your videos before flying to Japan

  7. ご結婚おめでとうございます!
    末長くお幸せに!!!
    *・゜・*:.。..。.:*・゜

    彼女…いや奥さんはなぜそんなに英語がペラペラなのでしょうか!?

  8. Late to the video but best of luck to a long and happy AND Fruitful marriage. WOW what a beautiful wife you have. What happened…did she lose a bet 🙂

    No actual marriage ceremony until?

    Maybe its time to let the little growth on chin to go too.

  9. Congratulations on your marriage! It’s actually on my birthday! From personal experience, it’s lucky! Haha

  10. "What Getting Married in Japan is Really like" the same as everywhere else I presume, bride wants the world and the guy gets fuq'd in more ways than one.. get a pre-nup, and don't trust anything that bleeds for 7 days and doesnt drop down dead afterwards

  11. in the U.S., everyone likes getting married on a Saturday and it doesn’t matter what day of the month it is. the season is pretty important though: spring and summer weddings are really popular. not many people I know like having a wedding in winter, unless it’s on a holiday. though it is bad luck to have rain on your wedding day!!

  12. in Poland are 2 weddings:
    1. catholic: church>marriage>"wesele"= party> next day after party
    2. civilian: marriage(civil worker comes to wedding whit papers and you sigh them)>"wesele" >next day after party
    in both cases people usually give envelope whit money as gift+nice wine
    if guest wants to give wedding gift then married couple send you wedding gift list whit what they want…
    as for who is a sponsor for the wedding im not sure about that but i think parents of the bride pays for place and parents of the groom pays for liquor

  13. Unless you REALLY have your heart set on living in the US I would stay in Japan. Our healthcare is ridiculously expensive here. Unless you can get hired by a private company with a outstanding health insurance policy or you can afford a really great private health insurance policy on your own it will be very pricey to get medical care. Americans are flying to foreign countries just to get necessary medical treatments or the medicine they need to survive (like insuilin for diabetics).

  14. Hey mate!! Great channel bro, any chance you did or planning on doing a video of all the neighbourhood around Tokyo to locate which are good not good cheap not cheap and so on…? Could be useful 😀 cheers keep on the good job mate

  15. I got married on 1.11.11, but, it didn't go well. Fortunately, you're married to a much MUCH cooler woman. Belated congratulations!!!

  16. Grandiose weddings are overrated for me in my opinion. I mean kudos to the ones who save up and pay a surmountable amount out of pocket but I would rather have a backyard wedding with close knit friends and family and have everybody bring food so we’ll have a potluck. If I had to save up money for something I would rather save it for me and my wife to be’s future.

    Congrats on tying the knot dude. Someday I hope to see Japan but I want to achieve at least N3 before stepping foot in the land of the rising sun.

  17. i got married in the norwalk court house, but had all my wedding ceremony in toyohashi because thats my wifes hometown. had my honeymoon in hiroshima, miyajima island ,osaka and a day in kamakura. was alot of trains but i can honestly say i love japan and besides feral deer biting me at a tourist trap i had a great time that time. other trips i had some problems but mostly because i was a barbarian and unsupervised while my wife was at work.

  18. I got married 8 Years ago September 2011 in New Zealand my country of birth my wife is Filipino living & working in New Zealand myself I departed September 84 since I don't live in New Zealand we asked that the guest invited primary my family and my wife's friends primary Filipinos and her work friends to give us an offering in money since I paid for the wedding since I work in the mining industry in Western Australia each case is different but that what we did the money was the best option instead of buying us gifts and taking then back to Australia as I already had the house already set up.

  19. No kiss when they were told it's official? I know it's Japan so maybe not inside the registration building, but c'mon, nothing? Oh well, congratulations!

  20. I'm from Singapore.

    Each time we attend a wedding, we have to wrap a "red packet" which is what was mentioned. How much you give depends on 1) the location, 2) how close you are to the couple.

  21. In my Culture, the two families have discussions on the wedding details and make an agreement. Then each family will discuss with their own family members how much each family unit will give towards the Bride/Groom share. However, the downside is, the family members will get upset if they don't like/agree with the details or where specifically their contribution is going to. They will even refuse to "gift money" and or attend the wedding. It can seriously end a Couple's wedding at the discussion stage. I grew up with so many wedding horror stories, it gave me anxiety every time my Partner brought up marriage. Thankfully, 9 years later we kept ours simple, short & sweet.

  22. Our parents don’t pay anything
    We handle whatever expense means needed. We live in USA and Chinese background. Chinese parents don’t always pay everything like what most of the people thought.

  23. 3,500,000 Yen? I paid that much for my wedding but had over 1,500 guests with a classy concert, dance show, and giveaway drawprices, all at a 4 star hotel.

    Lucky, all the 'red envelopes' made me recouped completely.

  24. i think the reason not so many divorces happens in Jappan is because not many people in Japan end up doing a vegas Wedding and it's less of a rush marriage. But I can be wrong.

  25. What fact didn’t tell you is divorce rates are 90 percent initiated by women. So if you don’t behave like a man, and take lead, she will tell you, “ I’m just not feeling it anymore.” She totally suck you into her feminine frame. Aka beta. Remember if a women can’t respect you as a man, she can’t love you. She might just stick around until they are no feelings left to replace you. That’s red pill truth.

  26. For the number 11 being luckier for marriage, that does make sense as it represents union, like two people coming together, it can represent a friendship or a marriage, but is different than brother or sister. 🙂

  27. I watched your last video about "why Japanese hate foreigners" and bang next video I'm watching "foreigner married a Japanese girl".. haha.. btw congrats

  28. In America the bride and her family pays for the wedding and the groom and his family pays for the honeymoon.

    The registration has a code and when you look online you see what they need and what was already purchased. U can check on your phone while u are at the store.

  29. So in Canada, a lot of people do their weddings differently, but cost is usually the main reason. I'm getting married next month, and I'm fortunate enough that my mother is paying for most of the wedding while my fiance and I are paying for the license, the church, our DJ, photographer and videographer and the suit. A lot of couples are going paperless, to help the environment but also the cost because just to get standard invitations of 100, can cost about $800. So we did ours actually on the computer, and sent them as e-vites, and we probably saved about $850. I was also fortunate enough that the hall we're having the reception at, my Mom and I used to work there, so we got a discount. It's all about the connections because even though we have both kinds of photographers, we got them at a discount because they know our DJ who is my fiance's second father (Father figure). So we really lucked out. Many couples try to pay for the wedding but because it costs a lot of money, many just go for the lesser and more simplified version of a traditional ceremony. Some couples get married and have the reception at the same location, while some couples use the Justice of the Peace at the Court House. The marriage license seems a bit different though. My fiance and I had to sign documents saying who our parents were and if they are/were married and when our wedding date is and if we had been married before as well. It's not until a Minister, Pastor or an Officiant signs the document that ceremony wise we/the couple is married. The document then has to be sent back to the government for them to notorize it and put it on file that we are technically and now LEGALLY married. it's lot of steps involved for it to be actually final. I'm not sure how different it is if you just go to the Court House. But that's been my experience. And I think nowadays, it's both sides of the family that try to help out the engaged couple. But every family is different. My fiance's family is very much, "this is what you want to do, you have to try and do it yourself".

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