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I’ll have to sit next to you. – Gross. Lucia hurry!
We’ll be late for the dolphins. Did you take aspirin?
– Yes. – Lie down now. Take a brake from studying for 2
hours and come with us to the zoo. Dad, I have an important exam.
– Nice, you’re more responsible now…We go to the zoo every year.Dad and Lucia know I love dolphins,
but once you grow up,
they’re not as much fun as they used to
be so you stay at home to study.
Marcos, don’t bother your sister she’s
not feeling well. Let’s go Curo. You’re not feeling well? You seem fine to me, really fine. Marcos is so responsible.
Did you bring peanuts? – Yes. We got 5 kg Lucia. Feeding animals is forbidden.
-If they catch you. It’s really cold in here.
– I’m hot. Curo, turn on heating for Gille.
Put the temperature you want. 23?
– 22. We could’ve gone bowling or to the
ham fare. – Sure. Curo is big for these things.
– Stop fussing, you love the zoo. Monkeys are your favorite. They’re interesting but I’m not coming
next year.My uncle likes to fuss and complain.The only two people who have a good time in the
zoo are my dad and I.
Lucia says that’s because he’s one big child.It’s raining… Don’t worry son. It’s just a few drops. A few drops?
That’s what Noah said.I’m scared to wish for something badly
because something bad has to happen.
That’s why I try to think of other
things but it’s not working.
Lucia… Our family is falling apart. But how can I not have the dirty look
when you’re provoking me? Everybody upstairs. Mister Serrano, if you
keep being like that, we’ll have to talk. Talking is what matters.
– That’s right. Everybody go change. God! What are you doing?
They’re in our bed. Cover up! – In our clothes.
– Wearing the robe I gave you!Marcos and Eva were playing
mom and dad that day,
but my dad didn’t like it at all.Of course, it drove my
dad crazy.
THE SERRANO episode 57
“A donut for you” Mom stop reading at the table, that’s
rude. – What a book! “Oceans of feelings”,
Pablo Rivas. What’s it about? A widow hires a Somalian gardener. They end up living great love. – You’re in 7th heaven. Leave the fantasies. No Somalian gardener can solve your problem. I asked you nothing. Curo, we’ll
play football later. You don’t want to?
– I don’t have a ball. Did you lose it son? Not really. I gave it to Rober junior, he asked
for it. – What? You gave it to Rober junior? No Curo, they stole it from
you for being a coward. Gille, don’t be stupid.
He said he gave it to him. You did well son.
– Did he use force to take the ball? You didn’t defend yourself?
You gave it willingly? Santi, you don’t listen sometimes. He didn’t say they took his ball but
that he gave it to them. Rober is his friend and you give
stuff to your friends. Rober junior has no friends which
means he stole that ball. He stole it for stupid.
– Gille! – Kid has a point. He didn’t defend because he’s a coward. Stop hitting me and stop annoying me. Curo, listen to me, I’m your dad. It’s nice that you gave Rober the ball, but ask him to give it back to you.
– Ask, I’m sure he’ll give it back. Don’t you get that Curo will never
see that ball again? You’re an idiot and a coward.
– Gille, shut up! Listen to me, I’m serious now. Ask for the ball. If he doesn’t give
it back… – Kick him in the balls. Shut up, don’t annoy me! Son, if he doesn’t give you the ball back… I’ll buy you a new one and I’ll buy
it today. – Thanks. You’re welcome son. One more
thing… Good morning. Let’s go to the living room. Lucia and I talked about yesterday’s event. We don’t want it happening again. We understand your feelings
and hormones, but this is disrespectful. To us, your brothers, sister, family.
It can’t be like that. It can’t. You have to understand our
point of view. And who will understand us?
– Eva, sorry. What is there to understand? You were rolling over our bed
in our clothes. What the hell were you doing
in our clothes? – Better don’t say anything. You made a scandal. You desecrated our bed in front
of your brothers and sister. It’s not our fault you came back earlier. I don’t think I heard you well. You had a plan?
You lied to us? We thought it was spontaneous but
you had a plan all along. What can we do dad?
We’re never alone here, and you won’t let us spend the night
somewhere. God! – What can I say,
we restrained ourselves long enough. Long enough?
Don’t say stupidities! No one can have fun in our
clothes around here. That is forbidden in my house!
Are we clear? – This is our house too. It’s not yours, you didn’t get it.
This is my house, and why is that? Because I’m the one who pays the mortgage. Remember, as long as you’re
here you’ll be doing what I say. Because this is my house.
My rules apply here. My house, my treasure…
– You’re kidding? – No. Say it again because it sounded
like you were kidding. Repeat it damn it!
– You know what? – What? I’m leaving your house. If Marcos is so am I. – One moment! Someone needs to think in this house. Where would you go without any money? We’ll find a job.
– I know what you’re up to. Just we’re clear, I’m not allowing
you to work in the tavern. Whatsoever, you won’t receive
a dime from me anymore. Excellent, because I want nothing from you.
– I’m glad. No way I’d work with you. – Great. I’d rather die of famine!
– Good. – I’ll live under a bridge. I give you a day to come back and
ask for forgiveness! Enough Diego! You’re unbelievable dad.
You solved the problem real nice. Now it’s my fault. I finished it last night.
– And? – It’s wonderful. – It is. And full of surprises.
How about that ending? Somalian gardener ends up with the widow. Lovely. When the two of them meet,
sparks fly all over the place. That man has such a sensibility.
-Yes. Pablo Rivas can really strip the characters.
– Pablo Rivas? Yes, he strips them both on the outside and the inside.
– Is something wrong? And you fell for the charms of Pablo’s
novel? – Yes. He’s great. Besides, not many writers would come here. He’s coming again? I thought he was
in Barcelona. – He’s back. He’s leading a course of creative writing. I barely convinced him. He thought I was crazy but I
convinced him in the end. I know the courses he holds:
me, me and only me. I loved the novel and it’s really generous of him to find time for this course. Sorry, but I know him as if he were
my child. He holds these lectures just to catch something. Good thing he’s your friend. I think he’s an excellent writer. He’s sensible and know women. He is a good writer but he loves
all the women. Dinner, champagne, having fun,
and he can’t recall anything after that. That’s a lovely description.
– Candela! – Let’s see… A writer, young and handsome…
– Pablo is handsome, right? Who’s handsome?
– What do you want Raul? Dad said to ask you for 100 euros for
new track suit. – Sure. Honey, I’ll be a bit late tonight. Lourdes and I are taking creative writing classes. Who’s handsome mom? I’m sure
you weren’t talking about dad. Bye Raul. You’ll be late for class. It’s your class.
– Mine? – Yes. Hi. Look how nice the ball I got for Curo. Tell Fiti what happened to the other one. There’s nothing to say.
– What happened? – Nothing. Tell me! – Curo is friends with
Rober’s son. He stole his ball.
– And what did you tell Curo? To talk to him and that he’s going
to buy him a new ball. I know. Lucia intervened and
you obeyed. – Yes. I obeyed because she was right. Is that weird? – That’s never solved
through dialogue. School’s always like that,
you win or give. If they bully you you always carry
that cross. – What cross? You take the ball first, and then you become a looser who’s
never again appreciated. You’re right.
– School is a jungle. Beasts mark their territory.
And how? – By spraying urine. I saw it in a documentary.
– Yes, but what does a cheetah do? It comes, stands and says:
“I’m a cheetah. Not even God can mess with me.” You’re comparing my son to a cheetah? He goes to third grade, and this is Santa Justa, nota a savanna. School is life. They mock you in school today, tomorrow they steal your notes
at the university, then a parking space.
It’s all connected. I’m not teaching my son to fight.
Are we clear? I don’t want him fighting.
– Clear. He became “three c”. That’s right. – Don’t play fool.
You don’t remember Exposito? It’s the one that bullied you.
He invented “three c”. Clod, coward, cretin.
Remember? – Yes, so what? He bullied you until you confronted him. Then you were no longer “three c”.
– It was a different time. It’s not a good example.
– No? You and your son are not the same?
That’s what you’ll teach him? If you hadn’t confronted him
you would’ve been miserable forever. Your son should do the same otherwise
he will be mocked. Okay leave me alone. When a woman says someone’s a
good guy it means nothing. We all think Brad Pitt is handsome, but that doesn’t mean we’d
be with him. Hi! What’s up? What are you doing? Nothing. We’re going to live together.
– Really? – Yes. You already live together.
– Raul, man… We had a problem and we’re leaving
home. We’re looking for a place. Sure, that’s great! You’ll be independent and alone. You and your friends. That comfort needs
to be shared. – We’ll see. Give that to me, you’re immature. 60 squares, king size bed… 800 euros? For how many months?
Monthly? Do we have bank warrants? – What? – No. 300 euros?
– Yes, yes! Shared apartment? With a
Romanian family? Are they nice? Eva, we left the house and we
have nothing. My father was right.
– No, we’re not going back home. We’re together and we love each other.
That’s what matters. Dad!
– What’s up? I need to talk to you.
-What’s going on? – Mom… She signed up for a literary course. You scared me man. Let her have fun, she loves books. It’s that writer’s course.
– Which one? The one that wrote those oceans. Pablo Rivas!
– Yes. I think she likes him a lot. Maybe she wants to start a new life. Possible, so what? Your mother is a free woman, she
has every right to it. Let her start a new life if she wants to. What will happen to us if she
leaves with somebody else? Son, what’s the most important thing? That you feel the love and support
and that you don’t watch us fighting. If your mom starts a new life, I’ll
be happy because she’s happy and you should be
happy too. You’re right. You’re right. She’s the most important. Of course.
– You’re great. If you’re okay, I’m okay too. It’s all good. – Yes.
– You’re the best dad. It’s good to have you around for everything. Bye!
– Bye Raul! I’m proud of you, Fiti. Damn it!
– What are you doing? He’ll steal her from me for sure.
I’m losing her! I was so proud a moment ago,
but now I’m not. This is no way to talk. That guys is getting involved in a
marriage of two people with a teenage son. He’s slyly using the crisis!
– Accept it. Women are crazy about that guy.
– Fiti never gives up! I’m going to win on his court.
We’re signing up for this course. Yes, all three of us. He needs to
be attacked there. If necessary, we’ll be sensible and
write about the oceans. Don’t count me in. I have enough problems with my kids
already. Sorry, Fiti. It will be transparent if I go alone. Candela can’t hook up with that guy. It’s for people who like to read, and we haven’t touched
a book in centuries. We’ll look ridiculous.
Candela will get mad. We don’t have to read the entire thing. We’ll just read a few chapters and write
about it later. It’s going to work for sure. Lourditas signed up too. If I can help you save your marriage
of 18 years, I’ll read as many books as necessary. Hi! Lucia… Have you heard from Marcos
and Eva? – Yes. And? – They’ll come later to
take their stuff. Don’t worry. They’ll back down eventually,
it’s childish business. No, Diego, we can’t fight with them. We won’t do anything that way.
We’ll be smarter than that. We’ll adjust.
– Okay. – Get it? What’ wrong Curo?
Did something happen? Did you ask Rober junior for your ball? Yes, but he’ll keep it for a while. What about the new ball?
– New ball… He asked for that one too.
– They stole your ball again. Confront Rober or you’ll
become miserable. Why are you such a coward, hiding your
head like an ostrich? What’s wrong with you?
Wash your hands honey. Have you lost your minds? – Lucia, we
have to do something. They’re bullying him, they stole
two of his balls. I agree but don’t be like that. I’ll talk to Lourditas,
she’ll solve it. Then they’ll tease him
for being a coward. Santi is right. – What?
– Curo has to defend himself. Since the beginning of time,
men fight. I’m a teacher. You don’t solve
problems with fists. Exactly, listen to me.
– I’m listening. You’re a teacher and you haven’t
seen such problems because girls don’t fight.
They don’t fight over dolls, but boys have been fighting forever. Unless they become cowards
and stay marked. Shut up, I’m talking to Lucia.
They’re taking his stuff. First it’s the ball, then notes at college, then a parking space.
It’s all connected. What the hell are you talking about? I won’t let my child fight. I got it.
– Let’s see… “Lazarus from Tormens”.
Anonymous. Anonymous?
Never heard of him. Look at this one. “Twenty love poems and a desperate one”. Pablo Neruda, Chilean.
No one knows about this one. You have to nurture yourself
with your own experience. You life is your
creating power. Feelings.
– May I? Are you Santiago?
– Yes. We signed up for the course at the
last moment. – Sit. Hi! We’ve met before.
Tell us something about yourself. For example, what
kind of literature do you like. I’m Fructuoso. I love literature in general. And that old one… “Lazarus from Tomes”,
from Anonymous. We are not too literate,
we don’t spend our days reading, but we’re curious and we came
to learn. – Excellent. As an introduction to this course, write something. Imagine that you’ve just broken up, you’re suffering and you miss
your loved one. Write about that.
You have 20 minutes, then we’ll read.“I can write the saddest verses…”This fits perfectly.
That’s what you need, Fiti.
They won’t notice a thing,
no one has read this.
Let’s hear someone’s work.
Fructuoso, would you like to read? Sure. I wrote a poem.
– Excellent. It goes like this: “I can write the saddest
verses tonight. In the nights like this,
I held her in my arms. My soul can’t accept
that I’ve lost her, even though this may be the
last time I’m writing to her.” – Lovely! Really lovely. You were inspired just
now? – Yes. It needs some adjustment but
the idea is good. Careful. You might get a Nobel prize for this. I’m not that good.
– I’m serious. They gave an award to a guy
who wrote something similar. What was his name? Pablo Neruda!
The one with the pipe. I suggest new exercise for tomorrow. It’s a common topic in
literature: “The first time”. First time what? The first time you felt carnal desire Lourdes. The first time you met love,
physical passion, surrendering your body. They’re coming down. Remember,
we have to adjust if we want them to stay. We got everything. We’re leaving.
– Great kids. See you. You’re happy.
– I am. I was adjusting, and when I adjust I see things clearer. It’s good that you’re leaving. It surprises you to hear me say this?
You’re wondering why? We’re in Europe. In Norway it’s normal
to leave your home at 19. We’re even more advanced, you go at 17
here. Off you go. If Gille keeps being wild, I’ll
have him leave in a year. Did you take the food?
– No. You said you wouldn’t give us
anything. – That’s true, but then I packed cheese and sausage. When you settle down, I’ll bring you
a better ham. A ham is what makes a home.
– Did you find a place to live? – Yes. – No. We did, they’re saving it for us.
– We have to pay an advance. How will you pay the advance?
And the rent, it must be expensive. Lucia and I will help you.
If it’s not enough, we’ll write a check. Diego please. Move that. How are you going to pay for your apartment?
– We’ll find a job. That’s good, working is honorable. We’ll make it work because we love each other.
That’s enough. Yes, love is enough.
What are you going to eat? Love? It makes you really full. Electricity, water,
gas, you pay all of that with love! Have you lost your minds? Eva, you’re 17 and still in school! You’ll work and leave school
for nothing? For nothing?
– Yes, Eva! It’s nothing! Marcos is the most important thing for me, and for me this ‘nothing’ is worth the
effort. – Really? You’ll destroy your life for being unreasonable?
Think a little! Sorry. I forgot how thoughtful and perfect you are. Eva, don’t be rude!
– I love Marcos. I’ll fight for our relationship!
You don’t know how that feels because it was all handed to you
in life! – Really? You know what? Both of you!
Out, now! Diego and I are not helping you.
– We don’t need you to. Then the food stays here.
Let’s see what you’re going to eat. C’mon Marcos. What’s the matter with you? You almost
bought an apartment to them! Lucia, you’ve told me to adjust. What does it mean to adjust for you? Adjust… What have you written beauty? “The first time I made love was with
my honey, in a pension in the neighborhood.”
– Okay. Full stop, same line. “We went there because we
couldn’t afford a better place.” Full stop, new line. What are you doing? – Nothing.
– I’m typing Fiti’s essay. I can’t type and Santi has
sausage fingers. He hits three letters at a time.
– Tete, I’ll help him. Go watch TV.
– Are you sure? – Yes, don’t worry. Sit.
– What are you doing? You’re reading cheap pornography
to her. Idiot! What pornography!
Do you know what this is? What? – This is art, literary essay. What is it?
– Curo’s drawing a Bambi. Bambi? Is that the lamb whose
mother died? Yes. – That’s really bad,
let’s go to him. No, Fiti! – Man, it’s
for his own good. He has hit the rock bottom. He’s been going in the wrong direction
for years with all the women and dialogue around him. We have to show him the right way. – He’s right. We can’t let Curo be an idiot. – I know. You’re right. He has to fight in order
not to be miserable. He has to defend himself. – You need to get the
eyes of the tiger out of him. Of course! I have an idea. Curo needs to be provoked.
I’m the best in that. Hi Curo!
– Hi Curo! Whatcha doin’?
– Drawing. Have you lost your mind? – Curo, Gille,
ripped your drawing! Nothing, this one is gentler than
toilet paper. Carry on! You won’t do anything?
You’re a coward! Dad, look what he’s doing! Curo, he called you a coward! You’ll allow that? If you don’t want to fight, go play with dolls with Mari
Tere. Girl! He called you a girl Curo!
– I’m not a girl! Defend yourself Curo!
– Defend yourself son, please! Look! The look of the tiger! Curo, son… “The first woman I was with
was Violeta…” Don’t talk out loud, I can’t
focus. – Dad! What are you doing here? – Mom won’t
eat dinner at home, so I’m going to the movies with Africa.
There she is. – Hi! Why is your mom not eating dinner
at home? She went out with that writer,
in Thai restaurant. That guy’s not bad, read the interview. Mom was so excited, like a teen.
She was trying stuff on, asking whether to let’s her hair
down or up… Was she pretty?
– Do you even have to ask? I would get furious when I thought
mom could get a new life, but you’re right dad.
I can’t be selfish. If she’s happy with him, I’ll support her. The same goes for you. If you hook up with the baker
or anyone one of these days, I’ll support you too.
– Don’t be surprised if I start a new life just like your mom. Don’t worry. Pablo Rivas wouldn’t be the
worst step-father. The guy travels, writes… I realized that thanks to you. That’s important. Have fun.
– You look good. Look. Almost 40 and not married. Says literature is his wife. Santi, don’t mess with me. The most exciting journey
was when he crossed Nile in a wooden boat. He’s a stupid and sensitive little writer. Women fall for those weird travels of his. He almost died in Tanzania. They gave him to eat worms with
hot spices, and he’s allergic to hot things.
You have two thing in common! You like Candela and you’re allergic to hot food. She’s starting a new life! They went to Thai for dinner! I don’t know what to do.
I have to think of something. I know! I have an idea. I’ll ruin their romantic dinner. You’ll find
out how. We’re eating out tonight.
I’ll call you. Fiti, you’ll mess this up!
– Hi! Hi.
– Where are you from? Oh my God! I’m sorry, we tried, but no money. Go back home. I’d rather sleep in the park or under
a bridge. – It’s cold. You’re still being stupid? When will you get your acts
together and go back home? We’re not going back home, I want
nothing from my parents. You’re proud! Hate each other then! You can’t come to my place,
Fiti’s there, but you can stay in the storage.
At least it has heating. Thanks. Not a word to Diego.
– No. This is perfect. We’ll decorate a bit and it will be
our first home. Iur first storage. No touching! Move so the air comes through! Uncle, this is perfect. We’ll finally be alone…
– That’s what I wanted to talk about. If you’re staying here you have to be super nice. There’s a lot of food in here and hygiene has to be impeccable. Respect this place and
respect each other. Here.
– Thank you, Santi. Marcos, this is stupid.
Reason with yourself and go back home. We can0t uncle. Here. Like a wedding present. Thanks. – Not a word to your dad. Yes, Fiti. Look what she’s wearing.
Like a TV star. Did you go?
– To New York? – Yes. No, I go to Benidorm.
– He’s touching her ass! No, he’s touching her back.
– I’ll show him back. Pervert, he wants to steal her from me.
Did you get the spice? I got everything.
Paprika, tabasco, garlic. Good. Come. What are you doing here?
– What a coincidence! Good evening.
– Hi. We wanted to eat in Chinese restaurant. It was full so we came for Thai.
It’s the same thing. We can sit together and talk about the course. Bring some salad, I think it’s
great. – Okay. We’ll join the tables.
It’s easy. I’ve lost my appetite. Here you go.
– Thank you. I liked your book,
Pablo. The one about oceans. And geography’s not my best friend. Honey, don’t look at me like that.
I really liked the book. Enough, Fiti.
– Fiti? You’re Fiti, the dead guy? Yes, that’s me, Fructuoso Martinez,
the husband. We’re celebrating 20 years of marriage. No we’re not, we’re separated.
Remember? – It’s okay. I’m the official husband, but my wife can eat dinner with you. I’m provincial but also modern. Are you okay Pablo? Excuse me.
I’m allergic to hot. Don’t worry, I’ll get you some rice.
– Please. – Yes, bring some. Thanks. Not so bad, huh? No. If there’s a nuclear war, we have enough
food for at least 3 months. Eva, I promise I’ll find us something better. That won’t be hard. We’ll find it together.
– Okay. How do you imagine our first home? I’d like for it to be big
with a garden. To be tall,
to look at the roof. Eva, first home. I’d also like for it to be tall,
to have a terrace. Yes! To stargaze.
You can’t see the stars here. And a dog!
– And a dog! It’s nice that we can chitchat like this.
Me as a husband, you as a friend. or whatever,
I won’t put any label. We’re just having dinner. Yes, but dinner here, lunch there… One thing leading to another, and in the end you realize
you’re starting a new life. I’m glad you understand… Look, I also intend to start a new life, there are things that’ve caught my eye. I’m just worried about Raul. Raul? Who’s that?
– Our son. You didn’t mention we have a son? Fiti, we’ll talk about Raul some other time. We sat together to talk about
the course, literature. There are thousand topics. Candela, at least we have many things
to say about Neruda. Again? What did you put here?
You were supposed to put him that. This is so hot.
– No. I’m having the same thing and it’s not hot. Look. It’s all good. It’s great. That’s you?
– Excuse me. It’s me now. Pablo? Take all the paper so he can’t wipe. Nothing Lucia. Nothing. They’ve turned them off.
We’ve been awake all night! Let’s go to the police to report
them missing. Give me the phone. –Here. I’ll take
a quick shower.Hi, it’s Marcos.
Leave a message.
Marcos son, it’s me. We’ve called more than a thousand times. Call me when you hear this message.
Did you hear me? It’s dad. God dammit!
You scared me! We haven’t slept the entire night.
– That’s why I’m here. – Diego… I saw nothing.
– Okay, everything is fine. I saw.
– What did you see? Your wife’s breasts.
And the other thing too. Pretend you saw nothing. What did you want? He’s going to tell us something
about Marcos and Eva. Don’t worry, they slept nicely. Lucia, did Marcos and Eva really leave? What are you doing here?
– The same as you. Talk! – They had nowhere to stay, so I’ve put them in the tavern’s storage. They’ve slept in the storage like
two olive cans? What else could I’ve done?
They’re my family, I love them. That’s right, Santi. Thank you. Your wife kissed me. He turned red. You can tell you
had no girlfriend in a long time. I’m not desperate like you, I don’t read books about Somalian gardeners. You’re so nice!
– I can’t believe this! Pepe, breakfast! You look horrible. Kids, to school. Don’t ask, I had a horrible night. Pablo must’ve slept in the toilet. My wife will ditch him.
– Tata, look. – What’s that? This is for Curo. – Why?
– Have you seen his room? Filled with Bambi drawings.
And wait until you hear what he’s listening to! “Andi and Lucas”.
– No way! They’re like “Los Pecos”.
And Bambi… It’s irreplaceable. I’ve brought him some movies.
– This is a good idea. “Martial arts”,
“Fighting to death”… Well done Gille.
This is a good idea. He should watch manly stuff, not all those
stupid things. You’re crazy. How can I give all
these violent movies to my son? Your son will be beaten and
you won’t do a thing? Who’s beating him?
– Seriously dad. Rober junior will fight with him
today. Everybody knows that. And in the meantime, you are going to sit
here with your arms crossed. Look at him, playing with knitting. He’s a lost case crying for help to
get on the right track. Leave me alone! Yes? – Fermin, it’s Diego.
– Hi Diego, how are you? I’m calling because I’m worried about
my youngest son, Curo. Why?
– I’ll try to explain. We’re trying to install in him
some traditional values, so he can go through life…
Out! That’s what we’re doing, but Curo
is not really getting any of that. What values do you refer to?
– Well life ones, typical. Move. I’m talking to Gille. Normal values that would help
him in his life. Be straightforward.
– Sorry, I don’t understand you. Fermin? Hi!
It’s Fructuoso. Hi. How are you?
– I’m Raul’s dad. I know, Fiti. – That’s right. Let
me try and explain this to you. The problem is that Curito is a softie. He’s so weak. When he goes to the yard, they take his ball, sandwich but he
doesn’t defend himself. He’s hiding his head like an ostrich.
– Fiti I’m his dad. He’s a big coward.
– Listen, Fiti… Fermin,
we’ll talk another time. He has nothing to tell you. I’ll tell you
everything. I’ll call you. Hi.
– Hi. How’s Pablo? He scared us.
His appendix is sensitive. Leave me alone! You think I don’t know why you came to
the course and dinner? Try to understand that we’re separated.
– Listen to me for a second. I came to the course for curiosity, and to dinner by accident.
– You think I’m stupid? You’re spying on me like a teenager.
You’re pathetic. Me?
– Yes. I am pathetic?
I speak the way it is. I’m not the one going to dinner dressed
like a teenager, I’m not showing my panties and
hiding information. You’re ashamed of your marriage and your son? You keep doing stupid things because it’s
the best you know. You just convinced me that I don’t have
to get back with you. Good morning! C’mon… Sorry. We’ll read some of the essays
about the first time. “We were walking in the park. There were a lot of stars and that’s when it happened. I gave in to the passion. I was young and didn’t think. He took advantage of my weakness and… Kissed me.” You were supposed to write about your
first sexual experience. Yes, but this story’s nice too. “My first time:
I was 14. I didn’t know her well. I think
her name was Violeta. She had a scar on her cheek,
I remember that…” Was she your girlfriend? She wasn’t really my girlfriend,
more of an acquaintance. She was well-known,
always standing in the same spot. She wasn’t anyone to me.
She cost me 500 pesos. I could find one for 300 but my dad
told me not to be cheap, because I’d remember the first time
my entire life. “Cheap wallpapers, bare light bulb. Small sink in the wall. That was my first and decisive time. I got pregnant and he became
my husband. We were kids.
We drank to gain courage. I was insecure, he was persistent. I thought love and life
were something else. The pension was o Ritz, and we were
two kids from the neighborhood. There were no candles, flowers,
champagne, nothing that a girl dreams of. But there was nothing to think about,
there was no way back. I married my boyfriend, the only man in my life.” Excellent Candela. There’s a lot of pain there. I like how you use direct narration. We could call it dirty realism. Excellent.
We continue in the afternoon? You won’t say anything about my work? What kind of realism is that?
Dirty, shady? – We’ll talk about it. Guys…
– Hi. I’ve found something awesome.
Apartment and a job all in one. The best thing is that the apartment
costs nothing. You just need to do a little
job. – What little job? To guard.
– What? – To guard. People are making a movie and you need
to keep the apartment safe. That’s all.
They’re shooting abroad. What do you say? The place is gratis and
you get payed. I’m a genius.
– I don’t know Marcos. Maybe we should get back home, this
is getting out of control. Eva, we have to hang in there. We have
a job and an apartment now. Eva! Come for a second.
– Coming. Yes? Santiago told us where you spent the night. Do you think it’s normal
To sleep in a storage room? And you got Santiago involved in all
of this. Poor man. Why are you being so stubborn?
-It was only for a night. A night?
– Yes. Diego and I couldn’t sleep at all. Please, come back home and let’s
forget about all of this. We miss you so much,
everyone does You thought you could make it on
your own? – Wait. Mom wait! You think Marcos and I
are incapable? You’re really smart. We already have both
a job and a place to stay. You have a job and a place to stay?
– Yes. I’m glad. You probably won’t mind
for me and Diego to see it. Probably.
– We wouldn’t mind. Are you coming for dinner?
Okay. Okay. At 9. You’ll give me the address later.
– Sure. A job and a place to stay… Excellent. Marcos and Eva have lost it.
Where are they going to live? You tell me. What are you doing?
– I have a headache. I had dinner with Pablo and
couldn’t sleep all night. Candela, not with him please! Nothing’s happened yet Mother Theresa. We’re saving ourselves for New York. Saving yourselves for New York.
You’re traveling? “Caja Madrid” had marvelous
loans for that kind of stuff. You know that Empire State Building has
102 floors? That’s where that guy and that paralyzed woman
were supposed to meet, but she didn’t come. Okay. We’re grown-ups right?
Pablo asked me to spend a week with him in New York
and I’m going. You know how I feel about him
and his relationships. I’m not looking for a husband.
I like him. I can talk to him about million things. Put yourself in my shoes. I’ve been living
with Fiti for the past 20 years. You know what that means. 20 years
of Sunday football, and Chinese on Fridays. He’s the only one I had, give me some air. Okay, take some air, but
he’s not the right guy. Fiti was the right guy? You love each other Candela, you’re
just upset right now. You’re right but… – Lucia, I can’t do
it anymore. It’s over. Sit over there and don’t move. That’s Rober’s son. – I’ll talk to him.
You keep quiet. How are you Roberito?
You want soda or some ham? No. I want to talk about Curo, my youngest son. I know you go to the same grade and that
he, occasionally, lands you his ball. Dad, he’s taking them from him.
He’s already taken 2. – Shut up. I also know that you, unintentionally,
bully Curo. That’s not nice. I also know you want to fight him
today. That’s no way to do things. You can be friends, but no bullying. I can’t be friends with Curo.
He’s stupid and weak. Not true. If we all thought that way,
the world would come to ruin. Imagine if Gille and I bullied you just
because we’re bigger. Would you like that? Touch me and you’ll go to the court. – Oh my God! Dad, I’ve told you the kid is rude. He took two balls and he’s laughing at us. We have to talk to him.
Talking is what matters. We have to reason with him. How much to leave my brother alone? 40 euros.
– God! Son, you can’t do that.
You have to think. Violence and bullying are not an answer. 25 and my dad will buy you whatever you want. Deal. 25 is a lot but okay. This is not a bribe, it’s an award. You’re Curo’s friend and friend of
our family. Family is showing you respect and
that’s why you’ll give in. Bye!
Gille, dialogue worked. Uncle Raul found you a real palace. I’m the best. It’s good.
– It’s great. They’re really shooting a movie here?
– Yes. Guard the place. If you’re using the bed,
change the sheets. And I’m sure you will be using it.
– What’s this? I don’t know, it must be a cop movie. “Never turn your back on the police”.
– I said it nicely. The kitchen is huge.
– Really? – It’s great. Vaseline… Would you look at that. Raul… Raul! – What?
– Come here for a second. You can tell it’s a Spanish movie.
– What did you say, whose movie is this? I have no idea.
– Of some Roco guy. – Varela? No, Roco Sifredi.
– He’s a porno actor! No wonder the sheets need to be changed. Where did you put us you idiot? Where have you brought us?
– I don’t know. They just told me the place needed
to be kept safe. Your dad and mom will be here in 3 hours. Where are we going to find another place?
-Don’t panic. This is a normal apartment. With mirrors but normal. Good afternoon! Let’s read the remaining essays. Fructuoso, would you like to read yours? “My first time, by Fructuoso Martinez. My first time was with the only woman I’ve ever loved in my
40 years of life. She wasn’t the prettiest one from our gang.
She was a bit skinny and my friends used to say
she’s grim, but, mostly, for me she was a queen. There were sparks all over the place
on our first date. I wish I had had the money for a palace, and jewelry,
flowers, champagne, all of it. But all we had was for a pension in
the neighborhood, a bottle of sidra and a box of donuts
from Casa Maria.” Those are our typical donuts.
“The next morning, I couldn’t stop watching her sleep. I thought I was the luckiest guy in the world. At the same time I’ve won forecast, lottery, and scratch card. I realized I wanted to spend the rest of my
life with her. I proposed. If I had had a golden ring,
I would’ve given it to her, but all I had was a donut. She said ‘yes’. I had a premium for almost 20 years. I still believe that the most important
thing sleeps… Slept next to me. While we were together, she gave me more than I deserved. She’s no longer there, and I regret not figuring it all out before.” Excellent Fructuoso. You know it. Keep your word or
you’re screwed. – Don’t worry. Girl! Are we fighting or what? Leave me alone.
– Girl! – Go away! Coward! – He called him a girl and
a coward. Isn’t he a coward? Big head, you won’t do anything? – Move. Calm down. Let’s wait for bribe to start working. He knocked him down Gille! What is it big head?
You won’t fight back? Dad! Did you see?
I defended myself! Excellent son.
Enough with the bullying. Kids what’s going on? See, I’m not a coward.
– You beat Rober. Super. Give me the ball. Give me the ball! I’ve put everything in the closet.
They can’t come in the bedroom. We’ll get busted Marcos.
– No. – Yes. Open up. Hi.
– Hi. How are you?
– Hi. This is the place. Yes… We need another utensil.
My uncle’s here. – I can see. Nice place. How much is it?
– It must be a lot. And what do you do? – Easy,
we sell insurance. We do it all over a phone. Where’s the phone? – The phone?
They’re installing it tomorrow. We use our cells now. Do you want to look around?
– Yes… – Sure. Don’t go there.
– This way. We’ll show you the kitchen, it’s really nice. The kitchen is really good. This is the kitchen.
– Yes, it’s huge. Look! Mirrors everywhere!
On the walls, on the ceiling. And what’s this?
A round bed. Santi, this is modern decoration. What modern decoration!
This is how brothels look like! Don’t exaggerate. This spins!
– So what? Listen, my kids are fine.
They have a job and a nice place. Who cares if the bed spins.
How do you stop this? Santi, stop provoking me.
– What’s this? Slut jumpsuit! Excuse me for a moment. You came to spice his beer? – No. I came to say goodbye.
I hear you’re traveling. – Yes. I was meaning to tell you but…
– Don’t worry, I don’t mind. You’re going to New York? Awes. Among all those skyscrapers and people. You’re going to see the King Kong building. Excellent. I’d go too if I were you. You couldn’t travel by a plane for that long. – No. I don’t see myself there, but I see you. – Yes. Here. What’s this? Divorce papers.
I’ve already signed them. Why wait? It’s all clear to me. I understood everything while you were
reading your essay this morning. You’re not happy with me, you never were. Don’t say that. – That’s right Candela.
I’m common. Pension and donut are not romantic. That was plain.
– No Fiti… Let’s not downscale things.
You’re completely right. You deserve better. It’s normal you’ve had enough Sunday football and Chinese restaurant. Don’t worry, I’m great. I’ll start a new life soon. The baker has her dibs on me. I’m fine. Don’t think about me. Okay? Well okay… You deserve to be happy Candela. Safe travels. Look at the camera!
How about this? “Never turn your back to the
police”. – Mother of God! I hope Marcos is the police.
Poor him if he’s a thief. God, it can’t be, my kids can’t
be doing this. They’re doing porn.
They tape it and sell. It’s my fault. I kicked them out, and they had to go for the easy money. It doesn’t matter. I’ll hire Marcos in the tavern, I’ll buy them a place,
I’ll do everything I need. Be discreet, Lucia can’t suspect any of this. Uncle Santiago and I were talking. You need wordiness to sell insurance. Or Santiago says so. Marcos stammers
and that’s not for him. We need more hands in the tavern. Yes, it’s better to work with your
family. What do you say? The paycheck you give is not enough
for this apartment. I’ll double it if needed.
And don’t worry about the apartment. We’ll find one by Puerta de Toledo
or Castellana. Diego, easy. Tell me what’s going on.
– Tell her! There’s nothing to tell, everything’s
fine. – No it’s not! Tell her she’s your wife! The kids are making porn. They tape themselves in jumpsuits and
handcuffs. – Moment. I can explain mom.
– Explain it. – It’s true. There’s a room with mirrors and a
camera there, like in James Bond movies. And the bed is spinning. Look. – They don’t sell insurance but
their intimacy! They tapa themselves and then
put it on the internet, video tapes and discs!
– Dad, Lucia, that’s not true. What’s not?
– It’s my fault. I kicked them out and made them
do that… – A moment! Mom, you listen to me since they… I can’t wait to hear it. This is not our apartment and yes, movies are really made here,
some Roco… – Sifredi. Who’s that? – He’s a porno actor
but listen. We’re just guarding the apartment,
we’re not filming anything. Marcos, don’t lie to me. I know you’re protecting me, but something is about to hit me. They’re paying us to maintain this
place, we’re not making porn! What kind of sick mind can even think
we’re doing that? Don’t change the subject, Eva. Enough!
I said shut up! Enough with the stupidity! Pack your things this instant because
we’re going back home. Are we clear? Mom but… – Home!
Not another word. I taught at one New York university
for years, Ibero-American literature.
I adjusted well. Candela, our first trip will
be New York. We can go to Paris any weekend. Remember our first trip? We had no money.
We had to save. We went camping with my cousin
Manolo’s tent. It was so cold!
– Yes. We weren’t even
in the mood for ‘it’. Wait! That was the night you told me you were
pregnant. Never again was I cold after that. We stayed up all night thinking about
baby names. – We argued. You wanted to call the baby Fructuoso Jr. I remember now. We had
to flip the coin. I won. He was supposed to be
called Fructuoso Jr. Yes, but I made you forget about that name. – You didn’t. I gave in because of the ‘morning job’.
That’s why our son’s name is Raul. After one of those, you could’ve named him
Marilyn Manson. If I don’t travel once a year, Barcelona suffocates me. Same face, same streets, people… I’m annoyed by those people who always
have to go somewhere to be happy. I don’t need more than coming back from work, the three of us having dinner and
watching TV. I know, Fiti. When I see your new brush next to mu worn out one in the morning… Mostly, that’s enough for me. – Mostly… Candela, what are you thinking about?
You said “mostly”. – Me? Sorry, I didn’t hear what you said.
Repeat. I ‘m saying how brave you are
to take this step . Most people wouldn’t have the courage. It’s hard to realize your life sucked, and that you need to change it. We have to go get the suitcases. Have in mind that the plane
takes off at 12. Check please. She must be flying across the pond now. Were you pathetic?
Did you beg? I didn’t beg. I did what any man would do,
I told her to leave. Women are emotional blackmail experts. They know where to aim. I’m starving from all the crying. Give me a sausage, I feel weak. It’s closed!
– Bring some beer too. I’ll go clean. Did you forget something? Do you need me to take you to the airport? – No. I was thinking about New York… You’re going directly to cruising the Nile. – No. If I go to New York, the first thing I’m visiting is the King Kong building, to see your reaction. – Mine? If I ever go to New York or Nile
or anywhere, I’d like it to be with you. If you still love me, of course. And Pablo?
– Pablo… I have a problem with Pablo. I don’t love him. I’m still in love with you. It’s a tragedy as any other.
Someone has their car stolen, someone has an allergy,
and I’m in love with you. You told me he’s ideal,
sensitive, educated. Yes, but he has a flaw. He lack something really important. What? He never says “mostly”. Lucia and I want you back home. Get out of that
Big Brother cave. Kids, you have to study. You need peace for that. That’s all. Something to add
Diego? – No. Okay, your turn.
– Should I say it? We want to come back home too, but you have to respect these conditions
and our relationship. What relationship do you have?
– Dad… Our turn. Will you let us talk?
– Let them say what they have to say. What do you mean by
“your relationship”? – I know. If you think this house is going to be
a brothel you’re wrong. No kissing or hugging. Are we clear? This conversation is over. Thank you.
– Great. – One moment. Please. Just a moment. Sit. We’re listening to them?
– Yes. – We’re listening to you. We think you can handle a few caresses in common rooms,
like kitchen and living room. Those things that come naturally, spontaneously. Spontaneously but decently.
– Yes, decently. Okay we’re done.
– Another thing. We want to be allowed to go away
for the weekends sometimes. Alone?
– Alone Diego. Who’s paying for that? Above everything we are supposed to pay
for the hotel, and we know what would happen there. You know what? I can hear that choir
again yelling: “Incest, incest”! I see my kids banging on the bed! No deal.
– Diego! Yes deal. I want the kids to live here. I understand there needs to be
mutual respect. Okay, from now on I’m blind, mute
and deaf. I’ll pretend not to see. Do whatever you want as long
as I don’t know anything about it. I don’t want to know.
– Then we have a deal. We have a deal?
– Yes. This is in writing. Marcos, it’s fine.
– Good night. I want to negotiate too. These are my requests.
5 hours of video games, sausage sandwich in the morning,
one bath a week, and more toiled comics,
so I’m not bored. Would you like to hit him or should
I do it? – Please. Yes… I understand Lourditas, you
know the kids. Of course, I’ll talk to him. Okay, thanks. I will. bye. What happened? –You know who
called? Lourditas. And? – She called because of Curo.
– Because of Curo? She says your son is behaving bad and
that he’s bullying his friends. Curo?
– Yes, Curo. That’s impossible Lucia.
Curo is a softie. Who’s in there?
– Curo. Diego, you talk to him or
I will. – I’ll do it. How are you son? Nice music! Could you turn it down? What?
– Turn it down! How was school yesterday?
– Good. I’m a new Curo now. What’s with all these balls? You gave me these two,
and the others I took from the kids. Son, why are you taking other kids’ balls? That’s what you wanted.
– Me? No, Curo. Sit. Listen… I wanted you to defend yourself, not steal other kids’ balls. Understood? You can’t become a bully now. You can’t be something you hate. – They value me now. Like they valued you when you beat Exposito. God I messed up…
Let me tell you a secret. I never beat Exposito. You shouldn’t look up to me. And listen, this is important.
I love you the way you are. I already have Gille and ym brother Santiago
to be jackasses. I’m proud of you and I don’t want you to change. Dad…
– What? Did they hit you too when you
were little? – They didn’t really hit me. They did, tell the kid the truth. – Stop hitting me! And shut up, we cleared everything. My dad would send me to defend
him because he was weak. He was “three c”. Oh really! I didn’t want to bully others. I was strong from my early age,
but I had a long tongue. You solve things with dialogue,
got it? You don’t,
because you’re “three c”. You’re short, idiot,
coward and Neanderthal. You’re Neanderthal. You’d always defend yourself by spitting and kicking… That’s thank you to your brother who always
defended you? – You defended me? You’re a feet tall. Idiot,
coward, Neanderthal. I’ll show you one feet!
You have no balls. No balls?
He says I have no balls. Guys, old people fighting! We’ll see if I have balls or not. Careful, it’s Lucia! What’s going on? Nothing. We’re teaching Curo…
Having a family talk. Look how nice the ring. It’s a bit thin.
– Thin? It was the most luxurious one in the
jewelry store. You have no idea. What’s this? You’ll give your
honey donuts too? Not any donuts. Casa de Maria donuts. We had them after our first time,
remember the essay. I out a donut in her finger instead of a ring. You’ll give her the real one now.
– You’re not romantic at all. I’ll put the ring in the donut and then on her finger. She0ll love it.
– Careful! Hi.
– Here it comes. Hi honey. What kind of surprise have
you prepared for me? I’ve prepared the new first date. Look! Donuts, dinner, and what comes after that. Let’s make a toast first, with wine
or whatever. You have wine? Santi! What happened?
– She swallowed the ring! Is she that stupid?
– Honey, push… It will come out.
Do you want me to stick my finger? – No! Should I bring “evaquol”?
– No, let’s go. Get my stuff. Translation:
Jovana Jasovic

James Carver

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